Walking Down The Path
I am feeling rather frigid. Im in this defensive bubble. Honestly, I do NOT need help. No! I am not denying it, neither am I denying the denial. For once, I am going to let my nude voice, voice out.
Today I was rummaging through my "underground cupboard", guess what I found. My old old diaries. Way back when I was 15. It has every single detail in it. And I meant every detail!
From my first boyfriend, to the heartbreak moment where pages where torn.
Movie stubs.
Letters.
Small Packages.
I dont do that anymore. Guess I grew out of it.
I'll let you out on a secret.
My first ever kiss with my first love is still dated.
7th March 2006 (tuesday)
Over the years things changed drastically.
I really thought I was in love, all those relationships I had.
I realised that was not the case.
I began to shut myself in this box which I felt like comfortable in.
I began to have this love-hate relationship with boys.
I
Dated
Lied
Cheated
Fucked
yes, I've done that in all my previous relationships.
I thought that was the norm since I could not give two hoots about stuff.
Then came this person from the other side of the universe.
Total opposite from me. I gave him so much trouble & shit.
Yet, time after time. He was there for me.
And now that he is not within my sight.
I can barely laugh.
You were the best part of me.
He is making me walk down the path that I once did.
The time, when I had this intense passionate feeling about someone.
Only this time round, the feeling's so much stronger
&
youre not by my side.
Today I was rummaging through my "underground cupboard", guess what I found. My old old diaries. Way back when I was 15. It has every single detail in it. And I meant every detail!
From my first boyfriend, to the heartbreak moment where pages where torn.
Movie stubs.
Letters.
Small Packages.
I dont do that anymore. Guess I grew out of it.
I'll let you out on a secret.
My first ever kiss with my first love is still dated.
7th March 2006 (tuesday)
Over the years things changed drastically.
I really thought I was in love, all those relationships I had.
I realised that was not the case.
I began to shut myself in this box which I felt like comfortable in.
I began to have this love-hate relationship with boys.
I
Dated
Lied
Cheated
Fucked
yes, I've done that in all my previous relationships.
I thought that was the norm since I could not give two hoots about stuff.
Then came this person from the other side of the universe.
Total opposite from me. I gave him so much trouble & shit.
Yet, time after time. He was there for me.
And now that he is not within my sight.
I can barely laugh.
You were the best part of me.
He is making me walk down the path that I once did.
The time, when I had this intense passionate feeling about someone.
Only this time round, the feeling's so much stronger
&
youre not by my side.
